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The Clootie Dumplin' ©

John McLean
Dumbarton, Scotland
1998

A dumplin' is a special treat your Grannie makes for you
She has a special recipe; she cooks it like a stew
She doesnae use a measure; she doesnae use a scale
She uses just her ain two hands and mixes in a pail.

Chorus:
Wi' a hanfu'o' this and a handfu' o' that
And a wee drap o' the other
Ma Grannie didnae measure it
so she couldnae tell am mither!

Ma Grannie used tae make it frae a' the things I like
Wi' suet, treacle, sugar, an' lots an' lots o' spice
She wrapped it in a clootie and put it in a pot
An' biles it up for hours an' hours, sae I can scoff the lot

Noo Grannie used tae make it as a birthday treat for me
She mixed in silver threepennies and charms for all tae see,
All wrapped in greaseproof paper, they're meant tae bring good luck
But a' they brought were broken teeth an' lots o' things tae suck

They say haggis is the Chieftain o' the Great Puddin' Race
And that Dumplin was in second place when they met face tae face
But the contest wisnae equal, the contest wisnae fair
For Grannie's special recipe wisnae even there

Ye can eat it hot, ye can eat it cold, ye can eat it fried wi' eggs
Wi' custard if your feelin' bold, tae put strength intae your legs!
An' when you're feelin' tired, an' when your feelin' low
A slice o' Grannies dumplin' will set you all aglow


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