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The Pussycat with the Silvery Tail ©

by William McGonagall's cat

Ian Barclay
Muscat, Oman

Beautiful pussycat with the silvery tail,
At night you are often heard to howl and to wail,
And occasionally raking in a dustbin,
Which tends to make an awful din,
Especially when you overturn a pail,
While searching for scraps, rank and stale,
Most diligently,
Nearby Dundee, and the Timex factory.

Beautiful pussycat with the silvery tail,
Who caused the Tay Bridge Disaster by corroding the rail,
Which gave way where you had regularly marked your territory,
Just as the Edinburgh train was nearing Dundee,
Causing the train and passengers to plunge into the Tay,
Which caused them much dismay,
On the last Sabbath day of 1879,
Which will be remembered for a very long time.

Beautiful pussycat with the silvery tail,
Who grew very fat from eating the Tay Whale,
Which had been put on public display,
But disappeared the very next day,
And all that was found was a blubbery trail,
The head, some paw marks, a few bones and the tail,
Another unsolved felony,
Nearby Dundee, and the Timex factory.

Beautiful pussycat with the silvery tail,
Who, we are told, went to London, by rail,
To look at the Queen,
Most gorgeous to be seen,
Because you had heard that, 'A cat can look at a king',
And you wanted to do the very nearest thing,
By visiting Her Majesty, upon her Golden Jubilee,
Far from Dundee, and the Timex factory.

Beautiful pussycat with the silvery tail,
I must now conclude my tale,
By telling the world, without the least dismay,
That thou art the loveliest pussy that walks near the Tay,
And makes the hearts of the children gay,
When they see you out strolling on a sunny day,
And they all go, "Chi, chi, chi, chi, chi",
Near by Dundee, and the closed-down, Timex factory.

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