The Ballad Of Thomas Kerry ©

Some men gain their pleasures
By sin and by debauch,
While others, not so active,
Sit and day-dream on the porch.
Many try to profit
From a life of active crime;
But Kerry,
Thomas Kerry
Was just drinking - after time!

Those who crave excitement
May land upon the Moon,
Explore the Rings of Saturn,
(Or they will do, fairly soon.)
Somewhat introspective souls
Write poetry and rhyme;
But Kerry,
Thomas Kerry,
Was just drinking - after time.

It's not a sin, committing wrong,
The error's getting caught,
For which one pays the penalty,
Or so I've always thought.
At the New Star Inn, alas,
Our hero's out of line;
But Kerry,
Thomas Kerry,
Was just drinking - after time.

Spare a thought for sailors
And the perils of the sea,
Spare a thought for Thomas now,
Wherever he might be.
So sadly out of pocket
From a twenty five pound fine;
But Kerry,
Thomas Kerry,
Was just drinking - after time.